On blessings and letting go…

I recently blew out the flames on a number of candles. (yes I am a year older, nonetheless still very young hehe) While blowing out the flames, images of the past year flooded my mind. Memories, both good and bad, zapped to and fro. I realized how lucky and blessed I have been. Despite the many changes and trials in my life, I have been given so much love and support. With the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it is easy to forget to count the blessings we have. Being away from home and everything close to my heart has made me appreciate life more. Having said that, allow me to shout out a couple of long overdue thanks to the important people in my life (you know who you are).

To my family who never stopped believing in me and who never stopped giving me the benefit of the doubt (i am very sorry for the trouble, please believe that). To cousins who took time to bond over coffee. To cousins who constantly send words of love and encouragement (i miss you). To aunts and uncles who have shown their love in so many ways. To you whom I have hurt and yet you are still there for me and beside me after seeing both the good and bad in me and still accepting me (Words are not enough to express my apologies but I am truly sorry. Also in case you did not know I love you dearly, please know that). To friends who kept calling incessantly all throughout my stay in Davao, checking up on me (thank God for Sun). To friends who would make the effort to see me when I come back. To you who offered to be there beside me in person during that manic and panicky week (the thought was wonderful and also thank you for letting me back into your life). To you who would send me messages at odd hours of the day (I hate the time zone difference).To mentors who encouraged, listened, advised and supported me throughout and even after. To school personnel who served as second parents. To dormmates who became the sisters I never had. To you who became my sounding board in Davao. To you who took the effort to check on me at the dorm. To you who took the effort to be the 10% audience impact. To friends who helped build my vocabulary in Bisaya. To friends who readily accepted me and allowed me to be a part of their lives (I could not have done it without your presence and I am deeply honored to be a part of your lives). To friends who taught me how to drink like a camel (I am proud of it). To friends who adopted me into their clique (I will always cherish the long drives, the drinks, the stories, the laughter and the kulitan). To friends who still keep contact even after I have left Davao (you will always be a part of my heart). 

Being in Davao not only made me count my blessings, but it taught me a lot about myself. Life is all about change. We cannot go on without change. Change can be good or bad, depending on how we view it. Change is inevitable and it is best that we embrace it rather than resist it as there are many things in life that happen and stop us from following our plans. But despite the pain and disappointments, I do not have any regrets. Everything does happen for a reason. Without the pain and disappointments, I would not be the person I am in the present. Being away from my structured life made me see more facets of my personality bringing me to shift paradigms, realign values and eventually recreate new belief systems based on the values instilled in me. The entire experience has taught me that I cannot have my cake and eat it too. I cannot always get what I want. There are things in life that one might not just be able to have simply just because…and there are times when there is no good explanation for that. 

Apart from change, it is important that one would learn the art of letting go. Sometimes it is easier to hold on to the hope of eventually getting something as it is more painful to let go of that hope because it leaves you with nothing to hold on to. But by letting go, you will open up your doors to new opportunities for growth. Part of letting go is accepting the fact that you cannot control everything. Inability to control things from happening is painful, especially if one anticipates pain and yet is rendered helpless by circumstances. But all of this is part of growing up and maturing. 

Having said all that, I am grateful and humbled by my experience. It has grounded me a lot and made me realize my strengths and most importantly my limitations. It has made me realize what I want in life and what my priorities are. And after everything, I can now say that life is indeed sweet…:)